I usually get money from concert music performances and money from electronic music. This all makes sense. The payouts are labeled so you know basically where things are coming from and nothing is ever so wonky that I feel that it’s necessary to figure out which exact radio station in Poland played the track and why.

But for the past few statements, there’s also been a payout from MTV – for $1.96.

One dollar and ninety-six cents.

MTV pays me $1.96 every 3 months. I'm a rockstar.

The other side of the statement lists the show as something called “Next,” which I seem to have found at MTV’s website here. It looks like some sort of dating reality show, but trying to figure out more made my soul hurt so I had to leave. If one of you would like to venture into the cave and provide a report, I’d be much obliged. I might even send you $1.96.

Seriously, MTV? My music is used in the background of one of your shows and you pay me LESS THAN TWO DOLLARS?

I’m trying to imagine providing any service to MTV that would pay that little. The guy who delivers tacos on his bike to the interns gets a bigger tip than this.